Correcting our vision of the family's future...

Deuteronomy 6 in 3-D

by Garnett Reid

Grandchildren can do it like nothing else can. They correct our vision. As a father in the middle of the Baby Boom generation 25 years ago, I confess that I suffered from cultural and social myopia. I was nearsighted. Too often my main concern was the “now,” how things looked to people on the outside looking at my family. I wanted them to see me playing my role, earning a living, having my kids under control. We had to look like a normal Christian family, whatever that was.

Now, though, as I write these words, I’m about to baptize one granddaughter, celebrate the fifth birthday of the other, and soon welcome our first grandson to the family. My gaze has shifted forward; I’m looking down the road a lot more these days. What I long to see is my family knowing and loving God long after I’m gone.

Just looking the part of a typical family is not enough. I’m encouraged because our children, who are now in that thirty-something place where I used to be, realize more than I did how vital Christian parenting really is.

The Father Knows Best

So how do parents know what to do? More basic, how do parents know what to be? Where do we look for help? Many resources for parenting claim to give correct answers. Some really do that, some don’t. Believe me I know well the myriad of parenting ideas and strategies in the marketplace. I surveyed as many as I could when I led a class on the subject in our church a couple of years ago.

As helpful as many are, they all lack one basic essential. None come with the claim of being totally, absolutely right. We need truth about the family and parenting from the One who made us in His own image, our Father who designed the family for our good and our joy. God longs for a relationship with us that will restore His image in us, and change us into the people He wants us to be—whole, satisfied, fully alive. This God loves us and wants to fill our families with His love.

Nothing in our lives is irrelevant to this all-embracing love of God. It works its way down and seeks its level in every experience and every relationship we have, particularly in our homes.

Two Times Three in D6

We find this reliable word in God’s Book, the Bible. Deuteronomy six in particular is prime ground for finding parenting priorities that hold true for families in every age. Here two critical concerns seize our attention. First, God commands that we love Him with all of our being; then

He commissions us to share this love with others, especially our children.
Deuteronomy 6 in 3D examines these priorities from three perspectives—three dimensions, if you will. First, we look at the text of Deuteronomy six itself. When we dig deep into the chapter we find that the very nexus of life is to know God. He demands and deserves our unmixed loyalty. He and no one else fills that huge empty spot in our spirits and lavishes limitless blessing on us when our hearts flame with love for Him.

No Limit

The great Shema, “Hear, O Israel: the LORD our God, the LORD is one,” alerts us to the fact that only one absolutely powerful, loving being exists in the universe (6:4). And get this: He invites us to know Him in a personal relationship! Life then offers endless possibilities for anyone who will link up with this God.

Glad You Asked

Deuteronomy six continues by challenging parents to nurture covenant loyalty in this relationship to the Lord among coming generations. In planned devotional times, in casual remarks, in simply talking about life in your home—dads and moms, let what you say reinforce how you live before your children. Our first priority must be sharing our faith with our sons and daughters. Then as the initial surge of devotion to God shapes those priorities, we must stay true to Him through the years.

Here, in the context of life’s greatest loyalty and most important relationship, a son asks his father the most critical question of life: “Tell me about this God of ours and what He expects from me” (6:20). Whether you realize it or not, your children have wondered or will wonder the same thing. You need to know the answer when they ask.

Melody and Harmony

The second dimension of Deuteronomy 6 in 3D takes a brief look at how the Bible blends these two priorities into a single composition. It’s as if they take the form of melody and harmony. The melody commands us to love God with all our being. The harmony calls us to love our children into a relationship with our God.

Father and Son

One variation on this theme surfaces in the New Testament, however. Because of Jesus’ coming, the devotion to God so prominent in the Old Testament now flows to Him through Jesus. In Mark 22:34-40, Christ Himself makes it clear that the primal command to love God with all our being still applies to people under the New Covenant.

Now we love the Father by loving His Son. What also applies in this age is God’s concern for families who will honor Him above all else. Love the Lord with everything you are, then do all in your power to cultivate that love in your children.

Get Real

Yet unless the profound message of Deuteronomy 6 breaks into our lives and works its way into our affections, it remains just words on a page. Therefore, the third and final dimension of Deuteronomy in 3D examines how D6 looks in real life. I hear frustrated parents whose homes seem to be spinning out of control wonder where they should start, what they should do first to get a handle.

The important thing, Mom and Dad, is just to start somewhere. Take that first step. The best place to begin is in your own heart. Be sure of your commitment to God. Be sure you are trusting Him and loving Him with all your heart. Then love your children by raising the bar for them. Set a higher standard. Let them know that you love them unconditionally then hold them to what you expect from them. Do your best to nudge—not push—them toward Christ when they are ready. Don’t drive them away from Him and from you by living an inconsistent life, especially in the little things they see in you every day. Be faithful, humble, and transparent.

Make the spiritual seem natural in your home. Practice the spiritual disciplines—pray, read the Bible, sing, serve, testify, and be active in church. And do it with joy! Be sure to parent within the “web” of a local church. We need the connectedness of parents who share our priorities and who can share our laughter and tears. Remember that family restoration is a process. Be realistic in your timetable but expect God to do wonders as you follow His directives.

Of Such Is the Kingdom

No higher level of kingdom work exists than the worship and service we give to Christ in our homes and with our children. The family should run over with and pour out the love of Christ.
I’m excited about baptizing our granddaughter in a couple of weeks. But I’m more excited about how her future will honor the Lord who twice now has given her life.

About the Writer: Garnett Reid chairs the Biblical and Ministry Studies Department at Free Will Baptist Bible College where he has taught Old Testament for nearly 30 years. He holds a Ph.D. in Old Testament Interpretation and has pastored churches in Tennessee, North Carolina, and Kentucky.